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Last week, against a backdrop of Orange Buffoonery and trampled mourners, the old git and I sat and watched the clock in the sitting room as it arrived at 20:20:20:2020. one second of pleasure. Back in the 70’s when we lived in Wapping, we would stand in front of our VHS recorder until the time … Read more

I studied the British Constitution at school, never concentrated, wasn’t bothered, had about as much interest as learning how to plait raffia palm mats. But now fifty four years down the line my interest has been sparked by an old Etonian bully masquerading as our First Minister, a clever, calculating, manipulative nincompoop, imbecile, jerk, lummox, … Read more

What is it about sagging arms. My mum, my bubba, me. Sugar gliders, wings of flesh, that hang under the arms and are soft and perfect to play with. My mother had a comfortable, soft set, of two . That is until she got cancer and they removed her lymph nodes. We found out later … Read more

My computer tells me it’s 15.42, though the clock on the wall says 2.16. I haven’t been in the attic since the clocks went back, which makes no never mind since the batteries in the wall clock are flat anyway. Turning the clock back, though, would be preferable sometimes wouldn’t it? Not that looking backwards … Read more

I’ve been shamed by the Borowski family, who wrote such a delicious blog that I’ve come straight to the attic, put the heater on, donned thick woollen socks, opened up my blog and started writing. Trump and May, dominate my political head, but their antics are so confusing and dastardly that I have to turn … Read more

Rain is pitter pattering on the sky light. Emmy, in disgrace, is sitting on the armchair, having crunched her way through something. I got out of the bean bag and saw a dead, bloody corpse. Took my glasses off, put on yellow rubber gloves. Scraped the remains into a very big plastic bin bag and … Read more

My birthday included one meeting. A box of Macaroons, a bottle of champagne, candles, soap and a tiny pink pistachio cake with coffee. A walk down Tottenham Court Road, open mouthed at the newness of the tube and the loss of my youth. Lunch in China town, with dumplings and garlic shoots. Another meet in … Read more

Some say its the last of the summer sun, but I have my doubts. There’s pots to plant and lawns to mow and clouds to wonder at. On Monday I went to see Dr. B. The diabetic consultant. He took my blood pressure, declared it normal. Asked me about pains and gripes and remarked that … Read more

8.45 on a Sunday morning. January 10th. There’s a light grey stillness outside, all the decorations have been swept up and the cats are waiting to be fed. Him and her are asleep upstairs. Later on we’re driving into Hackney to collect some things, then drive home again with a boot full of creativity. It … Read more

After thirty one years living in the heart of the East Sussex countryside, with a view to die for and neighbours who take coffee of a sunny afternoon, after 31 years of keeping my bank details in Fenchurch Street, E1, after one score years and eleven I have finally decided to give in to the … Read more