Carravaggios canvas

Not that I understand art or anyfin BUT there are five different kinds of grey over the Pacific today.
Since I wrote that sentence nightime has dscended faster than a gymslip going over an eager school girls head.
I know it’s all to do with the Equator but if you’re not careful the day has gone and there’s nothingt left but rum cocktails and coconut chicken by candlelight.
I can just about make out The Isle of Chora now and it aint even time for the 6.00 clock news.
This morning we had an electricity cut thus leaving us without a kettle and water, since the water pump is run by the local leccy board. It did feel a little like camping in Dimchurch only with a view of the Ocean .

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From Russia With Love

This morning I had acupuncture and whatever she did the needles released something.
I cried in the car.
I cried in the loo.
I cried in the shop.
I cried in the studio.
I damn near cried on the show, only I held myself together with some herbal tea and Steve Campen, my producer/mentor/confessor and wind-up merchant.

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Needles in nightingale

I’ve had needles in my knees, to stop me feeling jealous and envious. Afraid that I’ll never work again, I’ve had needles bunged in my head to stop me being so negative. I’ve had needles in my brows to open my eyes to stop me looking Neanderthal and a needle under my right breast for … Read more

Blood on your hands

Every week I go to a Swedish woman to help me with stress, fear, failure, anger, age and my fat belly. Every week she puts needles in different parts of my body and talks to me in a wonderful Swedish accent. Today she stuck needles in my head. The needles made it bleed and the … Read more