Jeni Barnett

So all the friends dropped in envelopes filled with money and birthday cards. Even though it’s not my birthday till after we leave the European Union, that’s if we do leave the European Union, whether we ought to leave the European Union is another question, whether we should leave the European union, and all the … Read more

So we drove our American friend to our local train station at 7.55 this morning. The ticket office was open, and the man in it could not have been more helpful. Told her to get out at London Bridge, then take the Heathrow express from Paddington. 18.50 quid and she’ll be back in time for … Read more

We have one peanut feeder and two fat ball feeders hanging outaside our bedroom window. The birds land on the fat balls. And peck away. The squirrels jump onto the feeder and steal the birds nuts. The feeder bangs against the window, frightens off the birds, leaving the feeders up for grabs. For the squirrels … Read more

I’m bewitched by the birds on the feeder outside my bedroom window. I’m bothered by Donald Fartypants, and his dismantling of the United States of America. I’m bewildered by the antics of the British First Lady, who appears to be so out of touch with everything, that words literally fail me My lawn is covered … Read more

In 79 days I will be 70. Florence maybe? Or Bali? Or Tunbridge Wells for tea. Three dawters and an artist are making a surprise for me. Will it be in London? In Brighton? Or Tunbridge Wells for tea? I’m not renewing my vows. Or having Botox. I’m not going away on a spa day. … Read more

Lucky I am to have a full calendar. Lucky to have a fridge full of food. Lucky to have a clean cooker to cook it in. Lucky to have family and friends. Grateful for it all. Grateful for the cat, who’s lying on the table next to me. Grateful for the Irises given to me … Read more

It’s cold innit? About which I’m delighted – too warm and I’m reminded there’s warming issues on this ball of earth we call home.. We’ve raked the leaves so many times not one single forest fire will beset us until 2022. I’ve bought misshapen apples, cos they were cheaper. So after my yoga, which was … Read more

Brazil has voted in a heartless Devil, Sri Lankans are throwing chairs at each other in Parliament. Trump is a noxious shitty stain. China is burning coal around the world. Brexit is back firing like a monumental fart. Davide Attenborough does his best, young folk are ‘woke’, but there is an exhaustion with the magnitude … Read more

There’s something about the silence of the lambs, and sheep and cows. The silence of a frosty morning. The crisp moment when a dead leaf tumbles and spins, they say it’s lucky if you catch one. I held out my hands and a brown sycamore leaf landed in my palm. I often wear my pj’s, … Read more

Ok so I don’t sleep. Most of the time it doesn’t matter, my life’s my own, I don’t have to work to anybody else’s timetable, and like many nimble footed alpha females I have existed on little sleep for years. And then along comes The Michael Mosley’s of the world, and Facebook adverts, and Tabloid … Read more