Jeni Barnett

Right now talking doesn’t help. Brexit Schmexit, none of it matters as long as our children weep. Etonian bluster has won the day. Steve Bannon altering the wrong to make it Righter. Conspiracy theories about who paid whom to do whatever they did to keep the status quo chugging along abound. Who knows what’s true … Read more

First I felt one wet droplet land on my head, looked up and watched the slow drip drip of water coming through the bathroom ceiling. I woke the old git, who stood naked watching the rain come through the wooden slats. I went downstairs and got two buckets. Placed them under the steady stream. Himself … Read more

I am Jewish – whatever that means. I do not go to synagogue, although I have been in my life. I do not wear a wig for G-d. I do not normally write God, ‘G-d.’ I am married to a Catholic. I do not eat Kosher, although I always buy Kosher salt, it tastes better. … Read more

I am not ashamed to say that Saturday night is a special blend of heckles and fleckles. When a wooden telly presenter is voted in and a lithe DJ is voted out I heckle, when a vlogger, blogger, or Diva displays a passable fleckle I’m out of my bean bag and howling with the dog. … Read more

When I lived in Wapping, I was young, my hair was thick, my eyes bright and my body did what it was told. I knew the area as I had grown up in Aldgate, went to Canon Barnet school on Commercial Street and studied the piano at Toynbee hall. If you walk down the street … Read more

This autumn smells sweet. I collected a pile of fallen chestnuts, put them in my pocket till I got home, then sliced a cross in them and bunged em in the oven. The smell of Christmas wafted through the house. There are fields behind our cottage, a walk down the hill and turn right and … Read more

Wordsmiths have berated him. Politicians have debunked him. He has been shamed, humiliated exposed and vilified. There is no-one that does not have an opinion about him. And yet the Prime Minister of this country is getting away with it. Who cares whether it’s Dominic Cummings, Gove or Francoise who are dipping their greasy fingers … Read more

There’s a Boris truth. There’s my truth. And there’s THE truth. There’s a Trump truth. There’s my truth. And there’s THE truth. There’s the Media’s truth. There’s my truth. And there’s THE truth. It doesn’t matter who utters it, whose mouth it comes out of, THE truth is THE truth and there is no negotiating … Read more

There are leaves on the lawn. There are holes in the lawn. There are apples on the lawn. The lawn does not look like a lawn. There’s a dog in the house, in the garden, on the armchairs, on the settee. There’s a dog in the courgettes, in the horseradish root. Have you seen the … Read more