Trying to stand up date….

Worry lorra time twixt now and then.
So, as I write the sky’s grey, even though the primroses, forget-me-nots and Tulip tree and carpeting the garden. My feet are freezing, the old git has just laid a big log fire, and I’ve had a mug of homemade veg soup. Onions, leeks, parsley, potatoes and tomatoes. I bunged in a knob of turmeric as well. Simmered very slowly for 4 hours then put the veg through Simon Rimmer’s ricer, the first ( and last ) gift he ever gave me.
I’ve had more tests and now I’ve been passed on to a gastroenterologist. None of which will happen until I’ve had my Bank Holiday Monday MRI – yippee -and my Bank Holiday Tuesday MRI. One sitting up one going in feet first. I’m like the Spanish Senorita who married a Rabbi, I don’t know whether I’m Carmen of Cohen.
I have different sensations now like roller skating gerbils whizzing through my digestive tract holding a besom. My German Acupuncturist arrived last night with a box of needles.
‘Ve’ll get to ze root of zis’ she said stabbing my belly.
And indeed we will but not before a trip to Scotland to meet a Dr. who may be able to help me, and not before we’ve remortgaged the house and sold off the family jewels to pay for it.
My tests have been sent to the Highlands, Lowlands and Manhattan, to all three doctors working on me AND STILL we are none the wiser. My hot water bottles go everywhere with me, my salty baths reduce the discomfort for 20 minutes and my darling ‘oosbind massages my feet whilst watching the news, which given everything that is going on with this extraordinary Government could make me worse than I am if I let it.
One wedding, four parties and a funeral have been cancelled, trips to London are a rarity and I cant remember what a good curry tastes like – indeed I cant remember what a bad curry tastes like for that matter.
The buds are popping, the birds are feeding, the squirrels are chasing and before you can say pass me the painkillers it’ll be May. By the time we get to Christmas I should be better, smaller but better. I am utterly supportive of the NHS, I blame the managerial bugger ups that keep people like me standing in queues, waiting in line and forking out for private medicine. Jeremy ‘unt, supply your own consonant, should be ashamed of himself. I wonder how he would deal with 7 months of agony?
I thank you all for your support. x

6 thoughts on “Trying to stand up date….”

  1. Dear Jeni
    I’ve supplied my own C-onsonant, thanks. As an old leftie,I’d go private too in your situation. You can fight the good fight when you’re well again.

  2. The more opinions the better . Jeni … You are so so so right ! The managers have ruined the NHS ! Huge salaries and the complete lack of basic common sense in the treatments of the sick . ” it’s not rocket science !”

  3. I thank the devotion the NHS staff and consultant that have kept my husband alive for the last 5yrs and are still fighting for him even though he is 78yrs old…..we have no money for private and to be honest I know the NHS Docters and nurses are not doing it for the money they can squeeze out of us. Leaving the NHS is not going to help us lower income families……I wish you well in your health battle.

  4. Jeni
    So sad to hear you are having such an awful time. Life is so unfair, for someone who has bought smiles to so many people’s faces it is so unjust.
    When you were on the radio, I mean broadcasting not standing on the radio, see I’ve been to your “Audience with Jeni Barnet, shows! it always felt like sitting at the kitchen table having a chat with a favourite friend.
    Wishing you peace health and happiness soon Jeni, very soon, like NOW!
    Much love darling girl

  5. 3:30 am listening to radio, all about juicing, turns out it is not good ! Cuts long story short if you juice fruit and veg the natural sugars hit the gut too fast and can cause severe pain and constipation !!!!
    Don’t juice !!!

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