Check

I’m sorry about my absence but I can’t be the only one who is confused, dazed, horrified, upset, appalled, angry and exhausted, by the chaos that is surrounding us. We all have our opinions, we all think we know what should be done, we all know who we want in and out and out and in. We all point our fingers and cowl under the pressure of thinking we’re right, they’re wrong. We know better, they know nothing.
Yet still the grass pushes its way up through the concrete.
Broadcasters scatter the news, 24 hours of relentless horror. 24 hours of wall to wall coverage of the splintering of people lives. Congratulating themselves on who can get closest to the bullets. Turn away if the pictures upset you. This report may contain language, images, philosophies that may upset you.
Yet despite the carnage, purple clover manages to spring up through the cracks.
There are those that say endings have to be brutal, that transformation is always difficult, that the old makes way for the new, that it takes innocent Martyrs to shed light into the murky corners. But with loss comes pain, unnecessary suffering, the emptiness of grief. We watch and cry, paralysed this side of the screen.
And yet the world spins round regardless.
Powerless in the face of cynical reportage. Who to believe?
Frustrated in the face of self serving politicians. Who to believe?
I weed the beans, pick the raspberries, water the flowers, walk bare foot in the grass, thinking that I can’t be the only one who is dazed and confused.
Thankfully there are those out on the street doing, helping, caring, being. Whilst the elected still waffle and obstruct. Blame and deflect.
Who to believe?
When a country polarises it cannot pull together. When a country is riven with hate and anger, ignorance and intolerance, then the vulnerable suffer.
We await clarity.
We await calamity.
We fear the loss of free speech and democracy, we lament the loss of community and reason.
But, no matter what, the buttercups break through the bleakness. Shining their yellow faces to the sun.
The only constant is change, and change we must.
Tell me I can’t be the only one who is exhausted by the chaos surrounding us.
Primary schools are introducing chess. Instead of signing up for computer club hundreds of children are signing up to play chess.
In the quiet they think. They interact. They engage.
Conviviality and co-operation, silent connection.
Check mate – here’s to the future.