One outrage a day…..

Dear Poppy, says our twillage has four banks. Sorry….. So today I drove to Brighton to have my hair primped and coloured before my trip to South Carolina. But not before I went to the hospital to see the physiO. One letter change and it would ready physiC…. Which I sort of was . I … Read more

Marilyn’s in the house.

The highest point in our twillage is 242 metres above sea level. This summit is the highest point of the High Weald and second highest point in East Sussex. Its relative height is 159 metres, meaning my adopted second home qualifies as one of England’s Marilyns. A Marilyn is a mountain or hill in the … Read more

Green fingers.

After thirty one years living in the heart of the East Sussex countryside, with a view to die for and neighbours who take coffee of a sunny afternoon, after 31 years of keeping my bank details in Fenchurch Street, E1, after one score years and eleven I have finally decided to give in to the … Read more

Don’t Pranic Mr. Mainwaring

When I went to the hospital to have my elbow checked, I entered zone 2 shivering with indignation. The X-ray machine had broken and a twenty minute wait lasted nearly three hours. I was given a 50p deduction on parking since I had been waiting for so long. Still, having to pay anything at all … Read more

May 7th 2015

Two weeks ago the world was an altogether different place. Quotes will be quoted, embarrassments will be played and replayed. Humiliations will be written about and gloated over. Tectonic plates, will be forever moving in Scotland and hats will be forever eaten in Asdhdown’s forest. We’re all worn ragged by it. I’ve argued with my … Read more