Governmental dumping

The tops of the fir trees are swaying in the cold wind, the air around my feet is chilly.
Have to eat.
Have to walk.
Have to write.
Who says?
The prospect of all three does not fill me with enthusiasm.
I have a black t-shirt on, which smells of Prada, but I have to take it off as its cutting my armpits in two.
Jim is in the kitchen wondering whether he frightened off the last director he met.
B is in the bedroom talking with one of her girlfriends about the break up with her beau. Something we are all relieved about although that does not help with her heart break.
My no sugar no carbs Spiritual fast is going easy. But my no worry is dreadful. I meditate and when I reach a place of calm I never want to come back again.
Hang in there eh?
I hear you say…
All this will pass.
By the time the light goes I will be back in my bed wondering what happened to the 21st of February.
Going through it can only be done alone. I know all the platitudes, I know all the wisdoms, it’s just that sometimes I wish I was waking up in Mustique with talcum powder sand, swaying palm trees, a blue sea and 79 easy books to read whilst Jim is snorkeling down below, my dance card full and the bill taken care of by minor Royalty.
Can I be the only one who feels the weight of governmental dumping?
I think not.
I hope you are all well and thriving.

6 thoughts on “Governmental dumping”

  1. Oh how I agree with you Jen, the last few years for me have taken their toll with illness, redundancy etc. Whenever I feel down I try to conjure up the Maldives 10 years ago when I thought I didn’t have a care in the world. We’ll survive, we always do regardless of what the world throws at us. Chin up, onwards and upwards and don’t let the b*****ds grind us down. Lots of love.

  2. Sounds like you’ve hit a dodgy time. Those of us who were ever with you still are. We might not be as vocal or as obvious as others, but by hell, girl, you’ve still got us. We’re still your weird army.
    There’s great relief when our loved ones shed a load we know isn’t good for them, isn’t there? Even though it’s nothing but heartbreak for the one concerned. Which, of course, causes us a quiet and harsh grief of our own, that they will hopefully never see or know about.
    Hang in there? Yeah, not always as easy as it sounds, is it?
    Take care, yeah?

  3. Every year Jeni, my little brood say “This year Mum it will be a good year.” Once again we have been going through testing times. But I try so hard to count my blessings of which there are many for sure. I totally agree that sometimes slipping out of this space and into another seems so inticing. Mustique sounds good. Peace and love to you and yours.

  4. Dear Jeni
    I love the new show, I do hope you have all the success you deserve. Try not to worry so much, what is to be will be.

  5. Jeni dear,
    We all get that awful feeling sometimes but you need to work through it by not giving in and continue ruthlessly your lifestyle of healthy eating, exercising etc, otherwise it can spiral out of control. A healthy mind needs a healthy body, my girl.
    You sounded lovely on air this Sunday, so I assume you’re back to your old self again! I still wish you were on every day!
    Keep well dear,

  6. Love the show, Jeni, love your blog and the way you write. And I’ve just taken the plunge and booked the Glastonbury detox for the husband and me in late spring. I don’t think he knows what he’s in for (nor do I really) but if it does half what it says on the tin I’ll be happy. We both need it, times have been tough and s-d the cost this time. I mentioned you to Anna who said ‘oh bless her’. So bless you – and thank you.

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