Logs agogo

POSITIVE SHRINKING by KEVIN LAYE, has had hundreds of you wanting to know about tapping.
Buy his book, it’s only little, and you’ll be able to tap, dowse and think your self slim – well that’s what he says.
I had a productive meeting with Steve Campen, my ex producer, who is now helping me prepare AN AUDIENCE WITH for March 26th in CROYDON. We talked over coffee in Garfunkles in Leicester Square. He started it – when I saw the tears in his eyes I started blubbing and had to agree that making it to 60 was something to sing about.
Which I may well do….

I was sorry not to blog yesterday. I’m getting the hang of it again. When I blog I am aware of everything around me so I have material to write down. It’s very different from Twittering.
You twitter me, I twitter back, the question is WHY? I started the twitter so that I could get 800 people to come and see me in Croydon, the idea of playing to an epmpty house is too redolent of my years on the road as an actress.
After the radio show I went to visit URSULA JAMES, a top hypno-therapist. We talked about Paddington, where she lives in the prettiest mews house, my deserving of money, my deserving of fun and my deserving of holidays. We talked about body matters and locations for my future life. I sat in a little chair and could hear the purring of her ghostly cat. The purr gets louder the calmer I become. I don’t know what it is, I don’t kneed to know, just to say that the purring is like ruffling your fingers through the fur of a cheetah.
I am having dinner with her and 5 other women tonight.
I arrived back by 7.00 so Jim and I had a fancy curry in Battersea Square, we both bantered with Yasmin the maitre d’. She’s very chilled.
After Johnathon Ross, some of which was okay some of which was not, we played musical beds. The alarm went off at 7.00 a.m. and I listened with interest to the impassioned voice of Tony Benn castigating the BBC for refusing to broadcast the GAZA appeal.
Then at 9.00 Jim and I hopped into our old clothes, skipped down the stairs and jumped into the car.
By 10.45 we were back in the cottage.
Opened all the crap mail, ate custard creams from the biscuit tin, took several phone calls and then Mr Rapson delivered our second load of logs. He talks with a Sussex accent and always presses his whole body up to the kitchen door.
Gave him a cheque for the wood and then Jim and I set about our work. I think the reason we’ve been together for so long is our ability to work as a conveyor belt. He loaded the logs into a wheelbarrow, dumped them at my feet and I stacked them in the woodshed.
The old git told me they were a bit uppy-downy but I took no notice.
( Another secret of staying together….)
The smell of freshly chopped wood, loamy damp grass. Peppery leaves and earthy mole hills – two just by the gate – was delicious. The blue sky, frost melting in the sun. I had on a zipped up green fleece, a big brown scarf that kept catching on the rose thorns and a massive pair of Jim’s green gloves. Eight and a half wheelbarrows later we were done.
Jim packed a bag of props for his new show which opens in Greenwhich next Tuesday. ‘ONLY WHEN I LAUGH’ by JACK SHEPHERD. If you can catch it do he will undoubtedly be brilliant.
And then we set off.
I bought a new pair of glasses, very French and horribly expensive, but finally comfortable, ones that won’t slip off my nose. I nearly bought Armani ones but decided on Gaultier instead
Jim drove, we shared a small bag of kettle crisps and home made lemonade. I fell asleep as he listened to Classic FM. which is on the same corridor as LBC.
‘If a terrorist wanted to blow up all the radio stations they would only have to go to Leicester Square.’ he mused. Idiot! Although he may have a point.
Back to the flat by 3.00.
The sun was shining into the living room. All my bulbs are up in the cottage and in the flats window boxes – thanks to Ms Lavin my treasure – I’ve sorted out my emails and now I am having a bath in preparation for my second trip to Paddington in as many days.
Jims going over his lines; so you won’t have anything to worry about when you turn up.
Enjoy your evening and see you in Croydon