In The Telegraph’s list of Britain’s 54 poshest villages, Ightham has been selected as the county’s poshest. The village has Ightham Moat a medieval country house which is surrounded by flower gardens and a vegetable patch. There are dahlias and apple trees, ponds and the medieval house. We looked around the sparkling moat, the sun … Read more


The alarm went off at 6.00. The old git had inadvertently set it and the American woman repeatedly told me it was 6.0’clock/6.0’clock/ 6 0’clock/6 0’clock So I got up. Brushed my teeth according to my Swedish hygienist. Washed my face according to my Swedish face gel And brushed my hair according to years of … Read more


I actually had a proper dream last night. I was on board a boat throwing a party. There was a pile of presents waiting to be opened, guests – including my ex floor manager – kept arriving. ‘Alright Now’ was blaring out of the speakers and I was having a good time. I decided not … Read more

Dream Snatchers

I had a dream. Not like Martin Luther King, more like Martin Scorsese, it was filmic in its unfolding. My Great Aunty Becky was lying in a bed in the London Hospital on Whitechapel Road. I loved her. She painted her nails, always visited with a string bag full of goodies, and when she died … Read more